Yes this ball of lard has a Super Bowl winners ring !

Was doing a bit of fantasy football research today, and it meant stumbling across a picture of former New York Giants Super Bowl winning QB (well clipboard holding Super bowl winning QB) Jared Lorenzen.

The former Kentucky gun slinger is setting the Ultimate Indoor Football League (UIFL) as the starting quarterback of the (and I’m not  making this up) Northern Kentucky River Monsters.

The team are currently 10-2 and Lorenzen is tossing touchdowns to the likes of Otterbein University alumni Ricardo Lenhart and former ACC championship winner Willie Idlette.

Lorenzen looks like he is holding a child’s nerf football (which is bizarelly red, white and blue in the UIFL) in one picture I saw, as his side-on image looks like he is wearing half a dozen flax jackets. On closer inspection he is battling the stitching in his #22 shirt.

Lorenzen was always a ‘larger than life’ quarterback, but seeing him bigger than a 1990s offensive lineman with a burger eating disorder was even a shock to me.

Everyone loves someone who is created outside of a prototypical mould, whether they are tiny like Darren Sproles or Danny Woodhead, or man mountains like Jonathan Ogden or Shaun Rogers, but in all my years of watching various football leagues around the world I have never seen a quarterback that looks like a sweating barrel on two legs.

All I can say is Jared – you are my new hero – where can I buy your Fathead hahahahahahahahaha

Follow the River Monsters on Facebook. They rock.

eeermmmm - not sure I want to buy this merchandise

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