So it came to pass that the weekly peek inside the psyche of Chad Johnson was over almost as soon as it began.
After one week where Chad looked like a joker that coaches were able to wryly grin at but deal with, the former Pro-Bowl wideout allegedly assaulted his new wife and was swiftly cut, like a ham hock in a bacon slicer.
Watching Miami Dolphins coach Joe Philbin skirt around the firing as Chad attempted to deliver his ‘I know I’ve been an idiot but please keep me on the team’ speech was pretty painful.
It was all over the moment he drove into the Dolphins training camp, got out his car and had his image given the old ‘slo-mo’ treatment with the dramatic music in the background.
Now to many that cut was the most significant part of the second episode of Hard Knocks 2012, but to me it was Coach Philbin just looking completely underwhelmed as offensive guard Josh Samuda was asked to do a ‘spin’ to show his colleagues the rather extensive cock and balls shaved into his head.
After episode one saw the rookies getting spots of bleach rubbed into their heads to end up looking like manky leopards, the giant black penis was a sight to behold.
Now there is rookie hazing and then there is just an ability to look – well like a dick head – and Samuda is indeed the chief.
The Dolphins have not exactly looked good in the Pre-Season – two losses and absolutely no clarity on a starting quarterback.
Now the biggest dick has left the Dolphins organisation, its time to shave the giant cock and balls of everyone’s heads and get down to business, as the REAL football season is only a few short weeks away.
Fantasy hint – Don’t draft Dolphins wideouts – unless you have a 26 man offensive roster.